The doctor recommended the following: OT, Speech Therapy, SPED (Special Education) school. The OT was the easiest to find. It would be two months until we would find a speech therapist.
As for the SPED school, my husband and i both felt that it would be a dis-service to Anton to expose him to lower-functioning children. His language was emerging and he did not have the repetitive behaviors (spinning, flapping arms, rocking back and forth) that lower-functioning ASD children have. Our fear was that he would copy these behaviors and would actually regress instead of improve. (I have a story about this later.)
So, Anton continued to go to a Montessori school. The teachers were devastated at the diagnosis but knew that he would survive in a Montessori classroom. Even if he cried for the first two months of classes, eventually he settled in and got used to the routine.
Anton at work in Maria Montessori Children's School
Because of OT, there were big improvements in his behavior. The whining lessened and his behavior improved. The OT also worked on strengthening his gross and fine motor skills as well as improving his competence in Activities for Daily Living (ADL).
A week after our diagnosis, my adrenaline and hopes were up. We were starting our journey called "early intervention." But after trying for weeks to get a speech therapist, I was feeling helpless again.
Sometimes I feel like we're running around in circles with no definite direction. Then I stop myself because I'm sure he feels worse.
When you're diagnosed, you think that your doctor will hold your hand throughout the process. You assume that you will be given a "manual" of things to do. You believe that a path is being paved for your child's journey. After getting a second opinion from another dev. ped. six months after the first diagnosis (and the results were the same, by the way), I knew that our family was on this journey alone.
Doors will not open. Therapists will not fall on your lap. Doctors will not follow up on your child's condition. In the end, your child's future is in your hands. You look for the therapists and if you don't find one that you like, move on to (or more like "wait" for) the next. You bug the doctor's office for referrals and recommendations. You find alternative methods of treatment.
Some OT videos I bought from Amazon.com. Good for yaya and you to watch to turn playtime into a home OT session.
Only you will give up your time, money, your life, to make him better. When I realized this, things were easier. I knew I had to move on my own. That I shouldn't wait for referrals, that I shouldn't put all my hopes on a home program that has a wait-list 5 months long (btw, I still don't have a slot), that I should not believe everything I am told, read, and hear, and mostly, that I shouldn't blame.
It's easy to say, "the doctor promised me a slot in..." or (to my husband) "you're not helping me." (More on spouses soon!) But in the end, what does it do? Nothing. So, though it seems like I always get stuck in a rut and have to do this, I move on. I focus on Anton, I focus on what I can do. Never mind what others are not doing. I have to do all that I can.
Anton was diagnosed August 7. He started verbalizing requests later that month. He started playing with other kids in November. He started singing nursery rhymes in March, He started pretend-play in May. He was spelling words by June.
Things may not be happening as fast as they did during that first week after the diagnosis, but I'm okay with that. I'm okay with slow but surprising changes. I'm okay with small steps. I'm okay with all the starts that Anton has been achieving. It is because of all these small "starts" that Anton will finally finish this journey.
Anton's first nursery rhyme (or maybe the first one we understood!)
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